Any Well-Manicured Ape Can Be a Member of Congress

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Here’s the formula for being an awesome congressperson:

• Identify an important constituency in your district. For this example, we’ll use Medicare recipients.
• Propose a bill that increases subsidies for Medicare recipients.
• Run social media ads explaining to the voters how you’re “fighting for seniors.”

That’s all it takes. You don’t have to think. You don’t have to step on anyone’s toes. Just pledge more taxpayer money to some favored group. The national debt is already north of $36 trillion. Who cares if Washington becomes even more profligate?

Any well-manicured ape can make Medicare cheaper for Medicare recipients—especially when the simian has access to a national credit card with no limit. Making Medicare cheaper for Medicare recipients and the taxpayers, however, is a different matter. In order to do that, one needs intelligence and balls. One has to craft a bill that foists price transparency and competition upon healthcare providers, incentivizes Americans to be better stewards of their health, and limits the obligation of taxpayers to fund healthcare for seniors (no more blank-check tyranny!). In other words, in order to make Medicare cheaper for Medicare recipients and the taxpayers, one has to dismantle a key component of healthcare-industrial complex.

Okay, groovy freedomist, that’s all I got. I say America is truly the land of opportunity. Literally any adult who has reached the age requirements of the House or Senate can be a member of Congress. No intelligence or integrity is required. Just be willing to “fight” for seniors—or college students, or migrants, or trans-kids, or homeless people, or minimum-wage workers, or inner-city youth, or any other group we’ve been conditioned by our Woke Overlords to feel sorry for.