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It’s still the same old story
A fight for love and glory
A case of do or die
The world will always welcome lovers
As time goes by
My biggest frustration with the fundamentals of personal finance is that they’re shockingly effective and shockingly easy to follow. As soon as I embraced those fundamentals, I went from financial moron to financial crackerjack in three years, and from there I went from financial crackerjack to financial rockstar (i.e., financially independent) in another eleven years.
During my transformation from 2003 to 2016, I never made a killer salary. The most I ever made was in 2006—$76,000. The following year, I got my first job in Charlotte after relocating from Long Island and took a forty percent pay cut ($45,000 versus $76,000). My household income during this time followed a similar pattern. Solid to semi-solid and then back to solid—but never spectacular. Our household income was around $95,000 in 2003. In 2006, it stood at $125,000. Then in 2007 it went back down to $95,000. When we retired in 2016, our household income was up again to $125,000.
And all during my transformation, Mrs. Groovy and I sacrificed nothing on the material front. We always had a nice, functional car. We always lived in a nice home in a nice neighborhood. And we always had plenty of money for entertainment and travel.
I don’t get why so many people struggle financially. I’m about as average as one can be and I figured it out. I slashed my housing and transportation costs with geoarbitrage and egotrage. I subdued my desire for stuff by cutting the cord. And I learned fairly quickly that the easiest path to wealth is to tread upon low-cost, broad-based index funds. So what’s the freakin’ problem?
But then I remembered an old girlfriend from college. Sandra Maria de Faria was an exchange student from Brasil and she loved the movie Casablanca. And she was always singing As Time Goes By. And here’s the line from that classic song that identifies the crux of the problem.
It’s still the same old story. A fight for love and glory.
Yes, every one of us, whether we admit it or not, is fighting for love and glory. And there’s nothing inherently wrong with that. Who doesn’t want to be loved and be fawned upon by the masses?
The problem, however, is that the typical American isn’t very practical when it comes to pursuing love and glory. The typical American pursues love and glory via materialism; that is, the typical American is under the mistaken notion that to be loved and admired, one must have oodles of fabulous stuff. And if one can’t secure oodles of fabulous stuff with one’s income—no problem! Just spend one’s future income now and go into massive debt. The pursuit of love and glory thus turns into the yoke of debt slavery.
Okay, groovy freedomist, here’s the sixty-four-thousand-dollar question: How do we convince the typical American that materialism isn’t the best way to pursue love and glory? How do we convince them that the Cult of FI is the way to go?
I wish I knew. The truth is, I haven’t a clue.
Yes, the fabulous Mr. Groovy admits defeat. But I am pondering the situation. Perhaps in a few weeks, I’ll throw some ideas out there and see what the FI community has to say. In the meantime, here’s another installment of Talking Trash with Mr. Groovy. Have a great weekend. Peace.
Basically, I think they have to envy the life of a FI individual. And they won’t. Because for them, already wrapped up in materialism, the more stuff someone has the more impressive they look; it’s sort of an endless self-perpetuating machine, materialism I mean.
How do you get people to stop being sugar addicted? To start making wiser decisions when it comes to eating? You can’t. You just have to tax sugar and force them to do what’s best for them by making it hurt to do what’s against their best interest.
People are addicted to the instant gratification, the energy boost sugar brings. They’re addicted to the same when it comes to buying and having more material possessions. It’s pretty hard for people to get out of the loop without intending to, but once they do start making wiser decisions, it’s easier than they thought to maintain.
Just my 2c
Your income isn’t much different than ours. We never did without either.
I love it, Mark. Mrs. Groovy and I currently have the worst car on the block (2004 Camry with 177K miles). And I find it hard to conceive how our lives would be any better with a brand new Lexus. Living modestly in the United States is about as far removed from deprivation as one could possibly be. Thanks for stopping by, my friend.
“The typical American pursues love and glory via materialism”
I don’t think it’s just Americans, it’s almost everyone IMO. It’s tough not to get into the norm of buying more stuff given we are bombarded by that message every single day.
Noooooo!!!! Don’t tell me my Canadian friends are suffering from the same affliction?
One thing that sets you apart while we’re on similar income levels for our household is that we have two children. Childcare and expenses do add up for them, even though we have tried to keep their lives as lower cost as we could. I believe sometimes that creeps into many people’s lives, as I know someone who puts Disney on their CC each year despite never being able to afford to pay it off because their parents did fancy things for them (their parents made loads of money, while they do not) and feel it’s only fair to give their children the same upbringing. I know if my husband and I didn’t have children, we would be super close or FI already because our savings would’ve gone up each year, but instead much has been spent toward childcare, expenses, medical, or otherwise (food and clothing are rather non-issue for our costs).
Plus, as they age, activities or even travel is double the price! I could easily travel more by myself, but add a family and flights even domestically hit around $1,000k! Oh, and we’re limited on time of year for travel/entertainment when everyone else is able to do the same, too.
So, keep in mind, while some can keep their expenses for “stuff” lower, other factors do add to the bill. Not to say it all can’t be done (because we’re still doing it), but adding children definitely put us back quite a bit especially in early years of our careers.
Excellent point, Kate!!! Yes, my financial success should come with a big, fat qualifier: MRS. GROOVY AND I DON’T HAVE KIDS. If we had two kids, I seriously doubt our 60% savings rate from 2006 to 2016 would have been possible.
The math is easy, the psychology is hard.
And you don’t know what you don’t know, right?
I see a lot of this pinned on education. That might be partly true. But I will say this: I *know* every single school teaches grammar. How much of that stuck for the average person? 🙂
Part of what’s hard about money is that most of the lessons have to be learned the hard way. Abstractly, I can follow any concept. But when it’s my money, my skin in the game, well…that’s another story.
Anyway, that’s my take. ::shrug::
Penny recently posted…Five #FinCon18 Takeaways That Won’t 10x Anything
“The math is easy, the psychology is hard.”
Couldn’t agree more, Penny. And your grammar analogy is spot on. Our schools could certainly do better. But the real improvement must come from the students.
Personal finance isn’t rocket science. It’s pretty frigging simple. You just have to buckle down and get it done. Most people just can’t execute. That’s too bad because it really isn’t that difficult to live modestly.
Joe recently posted…September 2018 Goals and Financial Update
Agreed, Joe. Just a little mindfulness can go a long way.
I think the answer to your question is what we are doing. The more of us there are, I am a new member of this community, the more of us will be talking about it. Ideas spread like viruses. This is a good virus. These ideas will spread the more of us who talk about it.
I say that with conviction. It was reading MyMoneyBlog, a site a friend told me about, that helped break me of my spending habits that themselves were a reaction to the extreme low salary during my years as a young military officer. I made less than $20,000 each of my 4 years of service. When I got out, and was earning more than double that, I went a bit nuts. MyMoneyBlog was the first blog that got me thinking about money again, and saving.
“Ideas spread like viruses. This is a good virus. These ideas will spread the more of us who talk about it.”
I like the cut of your jib, my friend. I’m now a little more optimistic. Thanks for stopping by.
Speaking of movies, here at FinCon we got to see the trailer for the upcoming film “Playing with FIRE”. I am optimisticly waiting for that debut and hoping that it will get a wide audience. The film makers have told us that many of the people working on the movie have had an awakening. Pretty cool, huh?
And speaking of cool, I wish I were in the hip crowd that has your phone number! I sure would have enjoyed meeting you both.
Can’t wait for “Playing with FIRE” to hit the big screen. And as far as you not having our number, I think that can be fixed. I’ll have my people deliver that to your people this week. Mrs. Groovy and I would love to say hello. Cheers.
Completely agree that consumerism is the enemy for people to find financial freedom. The problem is that desire’s most natural endpoint is consumption. People equate success with owning multitudes of material possessions, thinking this fulfills their desires.
I wonder how we can engender a generation who longs to escape consumerism and instead values living within their means. How can we make these folks feel content with what they have and prioritize financial independence over unchecked consumption? I wish I knew the answer. I plan to teach my children the value of independence and will demonstrate that happiness doesn’t stem from consumption.
Love the way your mind works, YATI. The two paragraphs in your comment summed up the crux of our dilemma far better than I could in a thousand posts. I can’t remember a single purchase of mine that I cherished until it left my possession. And, yet, before I woke up financially, I thought everything I purchased was the key to my happiness. How sad. Thanks for stopping by, my friend. Cheers.
You have pointed out the biggest obstacle of those who try to get others to see the financial light.
We are at a significant disadvantage. Even though there are seemingly so many blogs out there in truth all the combined voices are no match for corporate America with the millions and millions of advertising dollars aimed at people trying to get them to overspend.
So true. And so sad. Rome fell because it was overrun by the barbaric hordes. America will fall because it will be overrun by advertising that brainwashes the masses to embrace debt slavery. Are we pathetic or what?
How do we convince others of the glory of FI?
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT!
I think once they have an interest, they can quickly get hooked. But holy cow, I’m blown away by how few people actual are interested. I’ve given dozens of books like Your Money Or Your Life to friends and family who I thought would be interested. I’ve shared MMM’s blog, Choose FI’s podcast, and yes even some Groovy love – but in the end I’ve found ONE person who was interested.
One. Well, two if you include the friend that mentioned in the same breath that she was also trying to “up her purse game”. Ugh. Fancy purses don’t exactly convey an appreciation for FI.
So I’ve given up. I consider myself a pretty good salesperson when it comes to something awesome to sell. And FI is pretty freaking awesome, and yet no one is buying.
“Up her purse game!!!” I’m laughing and crying at the same time. We live in a country teeming with grasshoppers and we’re the freakin’ ants. We’re doomed.
As much as I love British Invasion music, I love the old standards too! I think that fight for love and glory is somewhat instinctive and too many people don’t stop and really think about what they’re doing to their finances. Until something triggers that thought process, they don’t seek out PF blogs, Groovy guides, and other sources of information telling them what’s possible and how to go about it.
As far as funny movies go, I’m glad you mentioned Sleeper as I’m a big Woody Allen fan, but my personal favorite is Annie Hall.
Gary @ Super Saving Tips recently posted…Can You Ever Really Beat the System?
P.S. – I’m also missing FinCon. 🙁 There’s always next year.
Yes, I’m determined to go next year. I hear it’s in DC.
Lot of wisdom in this comment. Thank you, sir. And I’m so happy to see you’re a fan of “Sleeper.” Great freakin’ movie. I go back and forth between that and “Take the Money and Run” as my favorite Woody Allen movies. Miles Monroe grappling a big banana cracks me up every time. And and so does Virgil Starkwell trying to explain to the bank workers that “gub” is really “gun” in his robbery note. Classic stuff. Thanks for stopping by, my friend.
You get phone calls from FinCon!?!? You guys really are famous!
Some of The Lady favorites for consideration :
It Happened One Night
Bringing Up Baby
Singles
Friends
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Best in Show
Austin Powers
BTW, this was my first time listening. It was fun.
Thanks for the list, LIB. I remember seeing “Bringing Up Baby” in a list of the 100 greatest movies of all time. I always wanted to watch it, but never got around to doing it. Thanks for reminding me of it. And thank you for mentioning “Best in Show.” Loved that movie.
All the needed information is out there, and most people have already been exposed to it. But knowing and acting can be, and often are, extremely separated. This is the key benefit of a money coach or financial planner. I don’t mean someone selling an one-time plan, or just managing investments, but some who acts as more of an ongoing guide and advocate; helping clarify the most important “next” items then providing accountability. When those items are done, identify the next most important and work on those. Some people are disciplined enough to do this on their own but results show that most aren’t. 🙁
Brad recently posted…How to Defer Taxes on up to $55k when Self-Employed
Excellent point, Brad. For the profligate and undisciplined, a money coach or financial planner is their only hope. Sad.
It’s the whole ‘lead a horse to water but you can’t make ’em drink’ problem. You can tell people, show people, live an example, beat them over the head with it. But until they decide it’s time to change, they won’t. Keep being real, and inspiring through living it, you will flip on a few light switches in heads over time.
the Budget Epicurean recently posted…One Small Thing: Travel Mugs
Yes! “Lead a horse to water” says it all. Why doesn’t the damn horse drink? If I had this answer, I’d be the most famous financial guru in the world.
Love and glory…sounds good to me. The question is not so much should we try and achieve it, but more how much of each do you need to feel satisfied. If the love of your parents, spouse and children are enough, then you are fine. If the glory of a job well done is enough, congrats…Decreasing expectations can improve happiness.
Beautiful comment, my friend. I say that because 1) you’re right, and 2) I’m coming out with a post about “decreasing expectations” in the next week or so. Brilliant minds think alike.
Ah yes…I hope one day to do some trash talking with you. I feel like it would be a conversion of minds….
Look forward to the post!
We got to make that happen. Nashville is only eight hours from Raleigh.
My idea is something drastic like a Netflix documentary / series that highlights situations like these:
– Elderly people continuing to work in their 60s, 70s, and 80s because they are trapped in debt.
– People having to eat cat/dog food because they blew all their money.
– Working citizens who got too far into debt, that they then plead with the youth to not make the same mistake they did and to “save as much as you can now.”
– Show suicide rates that are tied to debt / money problems.
If you get a Netflix or HBO to do a documentary or series that includes all of these, it would have a good chance to go viral and wake up the population!
Just an idea haha.
Not a bad idea. Sort like a “Scared Straight” for the profligate set.
if the whole world eschewed material stuff the economy would tank. i want my friends and family to figure it out, though.
here’s my list in no particular order, with plenty of 70’s cheese.
1. airplane 2. blazing saddles 3. big lebowski 4. smokey and the bandit 5. let it ride (sleeper with richard dreyfuss and teri garr) 6. every which way but loose 7. the jerk 8. caddyshack 9. pick a monty python movie 10. used cars
freddy smidlap recently posted…Fix Up Your Home with Free Stuff!
“if the whole world eschewed material stuff the economy would tank.”
Agreed. Excellent point. Got a quick question. Was “Let It Ride” the one about horse racing and the degenerate gamblers who live at the track?
that sure is the one. forget sea biscuit or the war horse. this is a realistic look and funny as hell.
freddy smidlap recently posted…How Poverty was Different for Me
Awesome. Thanks for reminding me about this movie. I’ll have to watch it again this week. The characters down at the racetrack are a lot like my family members.