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For comic relief, I occasionally turn to a YouTuber called Infinite Elgintensity or IE. IE has created a nice little business for himself lampooning YouTube fitness gurus, crossfitters, and ego lifters. Check out two of his videos below. They’re hysterical. But be warned, IE has a penchant for salty and politically incorrect language.
I especially like it when IE roasts ego lifters. Flabbatar the Last Bar Bender at the end of the first video is my favorite IE mock. The guy getting his eardrums assaulted while he’s assaulting his own vertebrae (second video) is my next favorite.
When I was into lifting weights in my salad years and did most of my lifting in a gym, I couldn’t take ego lifters. Every gym I ever joined had them, and they were invariably guys. I wanted to slap them upside their heads and yell, “Nobody cares how much you lift. Nobody wants to hear your screaming. Just lift a weight you can actually lift with proper form.”
I was hoping that the ego lifter was just an 80s thing, something that died out with boomboxes. But alas, that doesn’t appear to be the case. The ego lifter is alive and well and I pity any normal person who has a gym membership.
Ego Lifting and Personal Finance
Don’t ask me why, but while I was watching one of IE’s gym-idiot videos, it suddenly occurred to me that the personal finance arena has its own example of ego lifters. If you equate expenses to weights, there are a lot of Americans lifting things they shouldn’t be lifting.
Let’s do a little critical thinking here and see if this analogy makes sense.
What is ego lifting in the gym? It’s when one lifts a weight that one’s muscles can’t handle. Why does one ego lift in a gym? To promote the illusion of extraordinary strength and impress friend and stranger alike. And what is wrong with ego lifting? It engenders crappy lifting form and thus greatly increases the risk of bodily harm.
Now let’s turn to personal finance.
What is ego lifting in personal finance? It’s when one bears an expense that one’s income can’t handle. Why does one ego lift with one’s money? To promote the illusion of wealth or sophistication and impress friend and stranger alike. And what is wrong with financial ego lifting? It engenders borrowing, living paycheck to paycheck, and neglecting one’s job-skills and thus greatly increases the risk of financial harm.
Call me an egomaniac, but that’s some damn good critical thinking. Ego lifting is just as common and problematic in personal finance as it is in personal fitness. Likewise, I find financial ego lifters to be just as annoying as their gym counterparts. I want to smack financial ego lifters upside their heads and yell, “Nobody cares what clothes you wear, what fancy restaurants you frequent, or what car you drive. Stop trying to be a big shot. Just ‘act your wage’ as Suze Orman would say and save a little goddamn money.”
Ten Signs You’re Ego Lifting With Your Money
Financial ego lifters aren’t bad people, of course. They ego lift primarily out of ignorance. No one has explained to them that every income has a show-off limit, and the smaller the income the narrower the limit. A person with a high income may be able to preen with 20 percent of his or her income and still have enough money to secure his or her financial health. A person with a low income, on the other hand, may be able to preen with only one percent of his or her income if he or she hopes to be financially healthy. There’s just no getting around the immutable law of ego lifting. If you preen beyond the show-off limit of your income, you won’t have money to save and invest and you’ll invite financial misery. With that in mind, then, here are ten signs that you’re ego lifting with your money.
Ego Lifting to Be Cool, Hip, or Daring
No one wants to be labeled a nerd. No one wants to be shunned for showing insufficient devotion to the current fashions, causes, and distractions. No one wants to be considered milquetoast. But then again, no one wants to work at a job one hates until one is 70 and no one wants to live in a tent on Skid Row. And these two unenviable outcomes are a distinct possibility when one devotes too much money to being cool, hip, or daring. If you do either of the following, you’re ego lifting and you need to stop immediately.
One. You spend more money on any of the following than you invest in the stock market.
Jewelry
Lattes
Tattoos
Cable television
Sports
Video games
Two. You smoke, pound alcohol, or use illicit drugs.
Ego Lifting to Have Lots of Wonderful Toys
Who doesn’t love stuff? And who doesn’t love being that guy or gal who has a toy that everyone else envies? But just because stuff is fun doesn’t mean you have a free pass to acquire it recklessly. In other words, you need an emergency fund, and you need to save for retirement. You don’t need 30 pairs of shoes and the latest iPhone. Sacrificing what is needed for what isn’t is the epitome of ego lifting. If you plead guilty to any of the following, you either have too much stuff or too much cutting-edge stuff.
Three. You only make the minimum payments on your credit cards every month.
Four. You rely on payday loans to make ends meet.
Five. You pay for storage.
Ego Lifting for Love and Glory
It’s human nature to seek the admiration of others—to show the world that you’ve arrived, that you’re a big boy or girl now. I get it. The fight for love and glory. But fighting for love and glory need not ruin your finances. I’m fighting for love and glory by maintaining the 277th most popular personal finance blog in the world (according to Modest Money). I’m not fighting for love and glory by living in a McMansion and driving a Porsche. My fight for love and glory doesn’t come close to jeopardizing my financial health. If you do any of the following, you’re fighting for love and glory the wrong way. You’re ego lifting.
Six. You buy a car with debt and your car loan is for more than three years.
Seven. You take out student loans to pursue a financially worthless degree in college (i.e., sociology, communications, journalism, photography, history, gender studies, etc.).
Eight. You buy a house with less than 20 percent down and your monthly PITI payment is 30 percent or more of your monthly household income.
Nine. You decide to have a baby with someone even though you and this someone lack money, worthwhile job skills, and a legally-binding commitment to each other (i.e., you’re not married to this someone).
Ego Lifting to Deflect Personal Responsibility
If you’re an adult with a sound mind and body, and you aren’t being physically restrained from doing anything constructive, you have the luxury of choice. You can read a book or smoke pot. You can jump on the treadmill or sit on the couch and eat Doritos. You can open a Roth IRA and grow it with automatic contributions or buy a new car and saddle yourself with 84 months of easy payments. You get the idea. But here’s the rub. The luxury of choice comes with the tyranny of personal responsibility. You reap what you sow. And very few people can stomach that kind of accountability. They therefore deflect. If you relentlessly engage in the below behavior, you might be guilty of the most damaging kind of ego lifting out there.
Ten. You blame others for your crappy financial situation.
Final Thoughts
Okay, groovy freedomist, that’s all I got. What say you? Have you financially ego lifted in the past? Do you financially ego lift now? Let me know when you get a chance. Peace.
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